Jeep Diet, Update

Hey all.  Well, it's been about two months since I announced I was going on the Jeep Diet, and it's been six weeks since I started it in earnest. 

The first few weeks I spent logging everything I ate, but not changing anything*.  I did this to get a grip on what I was actually consuming on a daily basis so I could understand better what I needed to change.  As expected, my daily calorie intake wasn't substantially huge.  But my fat and sodium were higher than I'd like and my protein was sort of low.  Additionally, the number of minutes I was averaging daily with exercise was pretty pathetic.  It's not that I never exercised, just that I did it so inconsistently that the workouts I did were reduced in efficiency by the number of days in between them. 

In May, specifically on May 5th, I started in earnest trying to change my diet and exercise.  I started going to the gym or working out at home more consistently.  I made better choices in what I was eating.  I didn't give up any one particular or group of foods.  I just made a different choice sometimes (and greatly reduced the "white group" as previously discussed here ).  I continued to keep track of all of my numbers just to see what would happen.  At the end of May, I calculated out the average daily numbers for both April and May.

Here's how they looked in April (4/17-4/30):

Calories:  1634
Carbs:  147
Fat:  78
Protein:  81
Sodium:  2081
Exercise:  11 mins

Here's how they looked in May:

Calories:  1449
Carbs:  169
Fat:  51
Protein:  88
Sodium:  1560
Exercise:  24 mins

Obviously the average calories consumed didn't drop that much, but the fat was cut by 35% and the sodium by 25%.  Exercise was easily doubled.  The result so far is that I've lost ten pounds.

Here's how it looks so far in June (6/1-6/15):

Calories:  1452
Carbs:  150
Fat:  59
Protein:  81
Sodium:  1615
Exercise:  41 mins

So, looking at my numbers so far for June, I can see that while I'm doing fine on my calories, the fat is creeping up, as is the sodium.  It's not by much, but I think I need to adjust it right now in order to stay where I want to be.  The increased exercise is a good thing.  I'd like to see it hit a solid 45 minutes daily but since it's already almost quadrupled from April, I won't complain too loudly.  And while I know it will get harder as I get closer to my goal, I think with a few minor tweaks I will continue making progress.

*Keep in mind that while I wasn't making better choices consciously, I do believe that the mere act of writing down what I eat makes me subconsciously better behaved so my best guess is that the numbers are slightly skewed to the good.

From the Garden

I got the first food from our garden today. Unfortunately, the birds (or something) had gotten to the first strawberry before me so it doesn't look great and will be going to the chickens later today or tomorrow. However, the cherry tomato looks awesome and I suspect Mister C will eat that in about .005 seconds flat when he gets home today.

The cherry tomato came from this plant and it looks like there will be more tomatoes soon.



The grapevines are starting to look viable finally.

A few weeks ago they looked like this...



And today look like this...



Here's one of my raspberry plants starting to leaf out nicely...



My blackberries are as well. A few weeks ago this particular plant was just starting to leaf out.



It now looks like this...



Here's a couple of cantaloupe plants...



A few cucumbers...



Our strawberry patch...



And last but not least, here's something starting to push up through the soil in one of my pots. I'll be honest, I don't know what it is other than that it's not a fruit or vegetable. It's some kind of bulb that Mister C and I purchased through Master J's school last fall that I never got around to planting. There were two different kinds of bulbs and when I found them while cleaning out my pantry a few weeks ago I just threw them in the pot and have been watering them since. Should be interesting to see what we get.

Update post

Wow, look at me not posting for most of March! I guess this just became an update post...

My father in law spent the better part of March here at our home in Arizona. He and my mother in law had planned to spend a week at the very beginning of March but then he decided to try a laser spine surgery. While she went home, he ended up staying for three weeks. At first I was a little concerned about having him (or anyone) in my house for that long. Turns out my fears were unfounded. He and I had a really nice time together. Since he's a photographer (and a Realtor) and an avid people watcher, we had a lot in common. We managed to go out shooting pictures one day and would have liked to have done more but it just didn't seem to work. We enjoyed our days drinking coffee and talking on the patio. Just my kind of company. I was surprisingly sad to see him go when he finally did leave.

The Flockers are no longer at our property. They are now residing at Mamoo and Papa's acreage where they enjoy several snacks a day (instead of just one), bedtime stories and constant supervision by Mamoo. One of those things is a fib, I'm not saying which one. So basically one of our neighbors had a problem with the racket the girls were making on a daily basis. The singing about laying an egg routine was one particularly annoying factor apparently. So I begged Mamoo to please take them to her home so we didn't have to give them away. Eventually she and Papa gave in and said they would take them on. Mister C and I loaded up the coop in our neighbor's pickup truck (why yes, it was the same neighbor that complained, why do you ask?) and loaded the girls up in a kennel in the back of the jeep, and headed three miles over to my folks place.

Unfortunately, since they had been free-ranging for a majority of their day at our house, they were less than thrilled at being more cooped up (literally) in their new locale. You see, Mamoo and Papa live on a acreage that is in a little bit more natural setting that our home. They have coyotes running through their property regularly and hawks circling overhead daily. So the girls couldn't just be running around loose unsupervised. Additionally, while our yard is small, we have a substantial number of trees, shrubs and plants. If a hawk did fly over, the girls would dive under the nearest plant and get out of sight. While my folks property is about seven times larger than ours, they only have a few trees that are fairly far apart, and a couple of shrub-like plants. The girls would be sitting ducks, sort of.

Last week I started searching in earnest for fencing to put around the coop so they could be loose safely during the day. I tried Craigslist with no luck and finally decided I needed to buy new. I priced out Home Depot for their fencing and then decided to try Lowes. Lowes had a ten by ten dog kennel that was six feet tall. And it was going to cost me about 1/2 the price of the same sized fencing at Home Depot. Additionally, since this was a kennel and not a fence, there was no holes to be dug for the support poles. Perfect. So I got the go-ahead from Mister C to make the purchase and Papa and I went back after he got off work to pick it up. In the meantime, Mister C had suggested using the block wall surrounding my folks place as two sides and expanding the kennel from ten by ten to twenty by twenty. Good call Mister C! Papa and I put everything together and released the Flockers, who proceeded to get even dirtier than normal taking a sand bath in their new expanded space. I haven't spoken to my folks yet but I think I'm going to try and get a few plants in the fenced in area for my girls to chew on. I'll just casually sneak them in under the cover of darkness and claim ignorance when they ask me about it.

Moving on.

Everything is leafing out in my yard. My strawberries, blackberries, raspberries and blueberries are really putting out leaves and looking good. My grapevines both look really healthy and are growing daily. The cherry tomatoes have a bunch of green babies all over them and the peppers are starting to get little peppers. We have sprouts of cantaloupe, watermelon and cucumbers starting as well. The orange tree is finally finished flowering and if even half of the currently pea-sized fruit makes it to fruition it will be a banner year for oranges. I still haven't plucked the last of the lemons off the tree yet and Mister C is working his way through the grapefruit (which I don't love). Yeah, it's looking like there's going to be some awesome fresh food in our backyard this year.

And lastly, I am now on the "Jeep Diet". What the heck is that you might ask. Well, that's when your charming husband removes the doors from your jeep and you realize that all the world can now see exactly how much extra weight you're carrying so you decide to start keeping track of your food and trying to exercise. Miserable man.

White shirts

I love white shirts. Especially new, white tee-shirts. I think a bright, white shirt is just the perfect complement to so many outfits. It looks clean. It looks summery. Throw on a black blazer and heels and I can go out pretty much anywhere. It's a classic look worn by men such as James Dean and by Travolta portraying Danny Zuko in Grease. Even the glamorous Marilyn Monroe was photographed wearing jeans and a white shirt. So it's a good look and I like it.

For as much as I love white shirts though, I cannot keep them clean. I probably have ten white shirts hanging in my closet that are no longer perfectly white. I end up saving them to use for gardening and painting because they're usually too new to even think about tossing out. I have even taken to buying them two or three at a time when I find them on sale at places like Old Navy and Target.

The main thing that seems to happen to my pristine white shirts is that I have issues with food. I don't know if I'm an excessively messy eater or if I just have really bad luck, but I cannot keep food off my white shirts. And because I'm not a member of the "A Team", everything that falls tends to land in a prominent and obvious location. Which, I have to say, probably cuts down on the leering substantially. Because most men don't seem to have a desire to continue staring once they've noted the dribbled food and summarily classified me as "special".

Lately, I've really been trying to keep my white shirts clean through various means. I have gone so far as to start tying a dish towel around my neck when I eat. This works fairly well most of the time, but obviously only when I'm at home. I try to portray myself in a little more mature light when I eat out in public. Not that you'd know that just by looking at me. When in public, I try to be more conscious of getting my food all the way to my mouth. Which is somewhat effective but falls short when I'm launching into some intricate story line that requires gesticulation to add pizazz.

Anyway, while at dinner with A on Sunday I managed to ruin my second to last new white shirt by dribbling ranch dressing down it. One would think that white on white wouldn't stain. Unfortunately ranch dressing is primarily fat (mmmmm, fat!) and it left a lovely oil spot on the shirt. So now I'm down to one nice white shirt. Which I wore today while out and about with Mamoo looking at houses. We stopped for lunch at Coco's and I ordered the french toast and coffee. I am very proud to say that I did not spill one drop of my food on my shirt.

As we were driving away from lunch however, I looked down and noticed a bluish/purple spot on my pristine shirt. You guys, it was the blueberry topping from my mother's pancakes. Are you kidding me? I don't even want to know how in the hell I got her food on my right breast. I got nothing. I am just at a complete loss for a reasonable explanation for this. Guess I'll stop by Old Navy and see if white tee-shirts are on sale tomorrow.

Gordon Ramsay meets The Swedish Chef

Master J has been watching and helping me bake since he was old enough to drag his chair in front of the oven to keep an eye on the cookies.



He knows how to read a recipe (and actually does). He is capable of doubling or halving a recipe as needed. But most importantly, he knows how I do things in my kitchen and generally follows suit.

The first thing I do is read the recipe. Even if I've made something a hundred times, I scan over the recipe as a reminder of the order of things. Then, based on the recipe, I turn the oven on to preheat while I pull out all of the ingredients I will need. I get together any mixing bowls that will be used as well as all of my measuring implements. Once I have everything together and start putting it together, I put away each ingredient as I use it. I do this for two reasons: first, it makes clean up easier and second, it guarantees that I don't forget to add anything. If it's still sitting out, I haven't used it. Simple, right?

Master J does a pretty good job of doing things this way. He's like Gordon Ramsay without the f-bombs. He enjoys a well run operation and the products one produces. So when he asked if he could make cookies the other day, I said that although I was still too sick to help, that if his dad would help him, he could.

Mister C agreed to help him. Mister C is not a baker. His baking style is reminiscent of the Swedish Chef from the Muppets. Minus the apron.

I sat on the couch watching in horror as Mister C casually destroyed my kitchen and my belief in his intelligence. Master J stood next to him trying to circumvent further damage. The conversation is loosely translated here:

Mister C: Okay, get me the measuring cup so I can add the flour
Master J: Uhhh, Dad? Wait...
Mirth: Don't do that. Have you read the recipe yet?
MC: No, it's cookies. How hard can it be?
M: Read the recipe, the flour doesn't go in yet.
MC: What? It says "stir together in a small bowl flour, baking soda, salt" What's the problem?
M: Keep reading.
MC: Oh. (He proceeds to follow this direction) Where's the butter?
MJ: I put it in this bowl. You need to soften it so set the microwave for ten seconds but check after five.
MC: K. (He sets the microwave for twenty)
MJ: Uhhh, Dad? Wait...(panicked look at me)
MC: What now? It's soft.
MJ: It's melted. This isn't going to come out right.
MC: It'll be fine.
(He throws it in the mixing bowl with white sugar. Master J tries to hand him the brown sugar.)
MC: Why do I need brown sugar? I already have white sugar.
M: Read the recipe.
MC: Fine. (eye-roll) Oh.
MJ: We need to soften the brown sugar, it's hard.
MC: It's fine (he tosses it in)
MJ: Uhhh, Dad? Wait...
Mister C flips the mixer on and looks at me smugly. About fifteen seconds later a golf ball size chunk of brown sugar comes flying out of the mixer and skitters across the kitchen floor toward a waiting dog.
MJ: Uhhh, Dad? That's not supposed to happen.
MC: Huh, wonder why that happened?
M: How hard was that brown sugar?
MJ: And why is the batter white?
MC: I don't know. (he now pours the rest of the hard, crunchy brown sugar from the bag into the mixing bowl without measuring while I try to pull my eyebrows out of my hairline.)

They stumble through the rest of the recipe until it's time to put the cookies on the cookie sheet. This is where the difference in style becomes really obvious.

MJ: Uhhh, Dad? You're doing that all wrong. They need to be evenly space, they're not going to cook properly. They'll be uneven and melt together.
MC: It's fine! (Slop! Slop! Squish!) They'll turn out fine!
MJ: No. No they won't. This is not going to work!
MC: (putting pan in the oven) You'll see, they'll be great.

Five minutes later Master J checks the oven...

MJ: Oh this is bad! I told you they were going to melt together!
MC: It can't be that bad! (Looks in the oven) Huh, maybe I did put them too close together.
MJ: That's it. I've had enough! No more baking with you!
MC: Well, it's not how they look that matters, it's how they taste!

As soon as the misshapen, melted together atrocities are done and cool enough to eat, everyone grabs one.

MC: See, they're not that bad!
MJ: They're not that good. Oh, yuck! I just got a big chunk of brown sugar! Can I spit that part out?
M: Yeah, go ahead. Thank your dad for helping you make cookies.
MJ: Really?

So, yeah, they were pretty tough to eat. And running across large chunks of brown sugar was the norm, not the exception.

Also, had it really been the Swedish Chef and Gordon Ramsay in my kitchen the conversation would have been the following.

SC: First, you put de fleur in the bowl!
GR: Hold on mate! What the f*&^ do you think you're doing?
SC: Then you add de melted butter and you stir it like dis!
GR: No man! F*&^! You can't melt the f(&^ing butter!
SC: Whoopsie! De brown sugar seem to ave flied out of de bowl!
GR: Oh my gawd! What the hell kind of place are you running here?
SC: Now, put it all on de baking sheet, like dis!
GR: Ah hell, man! Don't you have any pride? F*&^! No wonder you don't have any customers!
SC: And den, you take de cookies out of de oven and you eat! Bork! Bork! Bork!
GR: I quit! I can't work with such incompetence! Good luck mate!

The end.

Spaghetti Squash

There was a spaghetti squash amongst my fruit and vegetables this morning. I've never tried this particular vegetable, nor had any desire to do so. I dislike squash in general. But, since it showed up in my basket, I thought I should at least give it a try. At first I thought I would try it "later in the week" but I know me too well. I know that I would keep putting it off until the undesired item finally started to go bad and then throw it out. I decided to dive in and serve it tonight with some baked chicken.

I had to read and re-read the directions several times to "get it". They're not difficult, I was just sort of distracted and hungry. Once I figured that part out, the biggest problem I had is that it took a little longer than I expected to cut the squash in half lengthwise. I almost cut my left hand off with the first knife I tried. Eventually, and several knives later, I got it cut in half and the seeds removed so I could toss it into the oven. After rotating it once and letting it cook for an hour, the skin softened and I took it out. Taking the fork to the insides was kind of fun in a "Cool, I'm creating something!" way. I tossed in a little sea salt, pepper and a few tablespoons of Parmesan and tossed it together. I put some on Mister C's plate as is. For myself, I cut my chicken up and threw it into the squash and mixed it up some more.

Now came the test. Mister C looked suspiciously at the squash and announced that it smelled funny. Not exactly the reaction I was hoping for. But he tried it. As did I. And guess what? It's really good. We both really liked it. Even Master J gave it a try and said it was good. He had already eaten earlier so he didn't want any more than a bite but at least he tried it. I'm never going to mistake it for actual pasta of any shape, but it's really tasty. The texture is fairly al dente and the flavor is pretty mild. While it doesn't taste like pasta, more importantly to me is that it doesn't taste like squash. I think I can add this one to the grocery list.

Southerners? A little help, please.

I need some help from my Southern readers, or anyone with a background in the cooking that emanates from that portion of the country.

Here's the deal...

You guys know that every Saturday I pick up my fruits and vegetables from the co-op. This week, the basket included collard greens. I know approximately how to cook them in the traditional method. I also know that cooking a mess of greens traditionally will not likely be on my diet plan. I'm fairly certain that bacon fat and/or ham hocks are not considered "healthy".

Is there any possible method for preparing collard greens without the high fat? One that tastes great as well? I thought about trying to slip it into a salad all casual like and pretending not to realize what it was ("No honey, I don't know why the lettuce is so bitter today.") I just can't do that to my family. Plus, I totally can't lie with a straight face.

So, any input would be appreciated. A decent, healthy version of a traditional recipe shouldn't be that hard to come up with can it?